Stacy Hurt

Preparing an Exit Strategy…From Cancer!

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Author’s Note:  So many people thought this was about death, that I had to insert “from cancer” so everyone didn’t think I was exiting life.  That’s the FARTHEST thing from my mind!

My background is in business, so I keep in touch with my roots these days, mostly through my husband (a Finance guy).  He had a Schneider Downs (a local tax auditing firm) newsletter laying around and I read an article entitled above.  As I read it, I noticed the parallels between selling a business and beating cancer.  I credit the author, Mr. Imran S. Mohiuddin for the inspiration behind this blog post.

From Day 2, (Day 1, I was convinced I was going to die) my whole strategy was to beat cancer.  It was in fact an exit strategy.  Much like an intent to sell a business and make a profit, I had to develop a plan to get where I needed to be.  The “profit” would be coming out the other side better than I was before I fell ill.  I budgeted myself 2 years to get to cancer free, and 5 years to kick it completely.  So far, my plan and God’s plan (I’m a “God” girl…) match.  A friend of mine asked me recently, “What turned the corner for you? What was it that gave you the strength to fight and win?”  Good question.  I told her it was ultimately my mind and my attitude.  Once I convinced myself that I was going live, live well, and not let cancer stand in the way of my LIFE, that was it.  I shifted into “exit strategy from cancer” mode, and I never looked back.

I changed my entire diet, sleeping habits, exercise/fitness regimen, stress load, and perspective.  In his article, Imran says “Start by Building a Core Team”, and that’s exactly what I did.  I have a team of “skilled advisors” who I assembled early in my process.  I call them my “inner circle” and they know who they are.  I have a lot of “friends” and “family”, but I found out through a counselor that not all “friends” and “family” can handle a serious illness.  Some just flake out.  I hear from my inner circle during EVERY SINGLE treatment week, and there have been 35 to date.  They have BEEN THERE for me, rock solid when I needed them the most.  I will treasure these people eternally and their steadfastness and loyalty are what have brought me to where I am today.  I have many supporters but my inner circle have the “off social media” version of what’s really going on with me…good and bad.

Furthermore, Imran credits “well-organized files, powerful reporting capabilities, and tight operational controls” for higher valuations.  I couldn’t agree more!  I am EXTREMELY organized, I am super tough, and I don’t take B.S. from anyone!  I think those are cancer warrior layman’s terms for Imran’s advice of getting the most bang for my cancer-kicking buck!

He states “regardless of valuation, the owner must continue to operate and grow the business.”  I compare that to never slacking off in my fight and remaining vigilant no matter what.  Just when you think it’s safe to go back in the water, sneaky cancer throws you a curve ball.  So you always have to stay on top of your game.  Can’t let up, even for a second.  It requires tremendous discipline.

Finally, Imran discusses marketing.  I have taken my fight public in an effort to “attract serious buyers”; cancer warriors who want to follow my plan and set themselves up for the best possible chance at success, or as Imran states “maximum value.”  Much like in business, so many factors are out of our control.  When fighting cancer, it is imperative to dominate the factors that we CAN control!

 

 

 

Reiki – Real or Fakey?

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Image Credit: Eva Lin Photography

I am humbly honored to be getting more and more questions about exactly what I did to “THINK EXTINCT” and beat down cancer while caring for my 2 boys, one of whom is profoundly disabled.  I’ve never been an expert on anything, but I’m starting to feel like (at the very least) a very valuable resource to so many of my friends who are battling. That is very cool. I just want to help.

I also got some positive feedback on the videos. They weren’t “trending” or anything, but they were getting the good word of hope out there, and making some people laugh.  So we’ll explore and tweak that concept a little bit more in the future…

I decided that I’d walk through my journey here a little bit at a time; or at least different “days in the life of Stacy,” which are always interesting to say the least.  I’m going to break it down in my usual Stacy straight talk way to give you the low down which includes cancer, my disabled son, Emmett, and various other adventures. I know you can hardly contain your excitement.

I went for a Reiki session last Monday. There’s a lot of controversy that surrounds Reiki, since it doesn’t have any hard core, evidence based data to prove its effectiveness.  However, it must hold some validity since my integrative oncologist includes it as part of her consultative program.  To me, even the most tried and true conventional medicine is only as good as its application and follow through.  In other words, back to my “THINK EXTINCT” mantra, if you put your mind behind something and believe in it, it has the best chance of succeeding.  It doesn’t conflict with my faith at all.  So with that being said, I personally affirm the positive outcomes of Reiki in my world of existence.

My regular Reiki master is my friend, Terri Wahl. You can read more about Reiki on her website but basically it is promotes good energy and restores balance.  My first Reiki session was while I was at UPMC-Shadyside recovering from my surgery.  A CRNP administered it.  The Reiki Master lays their hands on various parts of the client’s fully clothed body.  I can actually feel Terri’s hands getting hot and I see her sweat, so I know something is going on.  I feel dizzy and lightheaded when I sit up from the table; again signs… And when I leave, I feel really good.  Terri is a very grounded, upward thinking individual.  We both enjoy an appreciate the natural soothing energy of Sedona, AZ.  At this point in my life and my battle, I only surround myself with people who lift me up higher than I am currently.  She is one of those people – she makes you feel better about yourself on a variety of levels.  She is professional, private, and pleasant.  Therefore, she is an integral part of “Team Stacy:  Healing Unit.”

Terri is also a spiritual medium.  I will expound on that part of the story in my book, but it’s pretty cool.

After you’ve done your research and you have more specific questions, give me a holler.

THINK EXTINCT, my friends.

 

A Magical March for Colon Cancer Awareness Month!

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Since I can’t steal “March Madness,” I thought I’d go with this!  Plus, there certainly was a lot of magic, and unlike my whole diagnosis and treatment, this is an experience that I WANT to relive… over and over!  So, I excitedly wanted to tell you about my amazing March (and we may just spill into April by a few days…).

First, was the official news that I was NED (no evidence of disease) on March 1st, the first day of Colon Cancer Awareness Month.  I’ve received so many signs along my journey, and this was certainly one of them.  We met with the same lung surgeon and the radiation oncologist who declared that my radiation treatments last October produced “satisfactory results” (surgeon speak) and now, it was determined I did not require additional radiation at this time.  That report, coupled with my first clear scan at the end of January declared me NED.  Since Stage IV colon cancer has one of the highest recurrence rates, the doctors don’t talk about “remission” or “cure” for at least 5 years, which means I keep going for chemo every 3 weeks indefinitely.  They call it “maintenance chemo” to keep the cancer away (that’s the goal).  Maybe it’s a lower dose, but I still feel sick, fatigued, and generally cruddy.  And I’m still on my 48 hour poison pump, which is a pain.  Many survivors have been NED and then suffer a recurrence somewhere, so I have to stay hypervigilant and on top of this shit.  Next scan is at the end of May.  Feel free to start the focused prayers/positive vibes now…

March 2nd was my bigger than life (literally) appearance on the Nasdaq screen in Times Square to “Join Genentech in the fight against colon cancer.”  Thank God it only rolled occasionally and for one day.  No one should be subjected to “Big Stace” quite that big.  But what a trip!  Every time I watch Shark Tank and see Kevin O’Leary standing in front of that screen at the opening credits, I always shout, “that was me!!”  Just getting the word out… in a BIG way!

Times Square - Genetech

March 4th was my next great day – National “Dress in Blue” Day for a future free of Colon Cancer.  A couple of friends of mine (Lynne Yater and Alissa McLellan) organized a fundraiser for the Colon Cancer Alliance in my honor, which was hosted St. Clair Fitness Center.  The girls ran a few pretty intense exercise and body pump classes – all I could do was witness in sheer awe… I took part in the brunch!  LOL!  I got to tell my story to a gym full of people who appreciate taking charge of one’s health through sweat and hard work!  I admire these folks!  One highlight was meeting Arthur Moats (Pittsburgh Steeler), who was there to work out.  And he listened to my story!  What an honor!  Now I have heard of Arthur Moats but when I was introduced, I just wasn’t putting it together (FAIL!), so I looked like somewhat of an idiot.  Meanwhile, Arthur is one the most sincere, down to earth, gracious individuals that I have ever met.  So respectful – so humble.  Wow!  It was really a pleasure to make his acquaintance.  THANK YOU Lynne & Alissa for a GREAT morning filled with positivity and lots of oxygen flowing in that room!

I hopped the T (I know… hard to believe that a big celebrity like me didn’t have a car service… scoff, scoff) downtown the same day to speak at the UPMC Integrative Oncology Breathing Room event at the Fairmont Hotel for my buddy, visionary oncologist, Dr. Lanie Francis.  Again, I told my story (backed up by my UPMC Medical Mondays video) to a room full of supportive folks who believe in the power of touch, movement, nutrition, and mindfulness to augment effectiveness and offset side effects of traditional chemotherapy.  This is my 2nd year participating in this event that raises money to provide services such as yoga, reiki, massage, and acupuncture to patients who cannot afford them.  Until we can get the insurances to wake up and reimburse for these treatments, UPMC continues to rely on outside support and is constructing a Wellness Suite at Hillman Cancer Center to accommodate a space for providers and patients.  It is a “labor of love”, and I am proud to be a part of it.

[Breathing Room Images Credit: Kylie Kristine Photo]

Next up – March 16th: partnering with Genentech for a Satellite Media Tour.  So what is a Satellite Media Tour, you ask?  Good question!  My treating oncologist, Dr. Vincent Reyes, and I sat in a studio in downtown Pittsburgh (after a heavy makeup application – for me, not Dr. Reyes) while different radio and television stations called in back to back for us to speak live or taped about the importance of screening for colon cancer.  I told my story and Dr. Reyes was the resident expert to speak about incidence and treatment options. It was a loooong day being that “on”, but we had so much fun!  Dr. Reyes and I both love the camera, so we took it super seriously, but were just able to be ourselves, which made it super comfortable.  We joked that we need a road show, because our relationship really showed through, which was what I wanted; as well as to impress my motto:  “if it can happen to me, a total healthy rule follower, then it can happen to anyone!  DON’T IGNORE SYMPTOMS!”

[What You Need to Know About Colon Cancer from NewsWatch Television on Vimeo.]

Other than that, I wrote an article for Everyday Health, was interviewed for another article in Dr. Oz’s magazine, managed to fit in 2 chemo weeks and celebrated a blessed, happy Easter!  (He is Risen!  Alleluia!).  Well, I am exhausted just writing this, and I’m in a treatment week yet again, so I am heading off to rest.  Thank you for reading this and for supporting my mission and passionate purpose.  I really mean it when I say, I love you!

Peace out,

Stacy

Time to Be a Grown Up

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I haven’t blogged in a while.  Really enjoyed my 2 off weeks.  My last 2 off weeks weren’t so swift… had radiation, numerous stressful doctors’ appointments, and grieved some loss.  These 2 weeks were wonderful!  Felt great, enjoyed some down time, and was mellow.  It was very nice and calm, which is good for healing.

But there’s something I have to get off my chest.  What is the deal with these parents acting so immature?  If I hear one more story about a parent being drunk at a kids’ event/party/sports practice, etc, I am going to lose it.  What the hell are you people doing???  And this isn’t “oh, Stacy’s just grouchy because she can’t drink.”  No – it’s called “Stacy is a grown up.”

Let me clarify – I’m all about having a few (too many) cocktails.  I’m the one who sends people on trips and says, “Drink 10 for Stacy!”  The trips where they are NOT with their kids!!  Or events where no kids are around.  Hey, have a field day!!  If you’re not driving, get loaded!  Whatever floats your boat!  My husband and I host an annual adult neighborhood holiday party.  Last year, I was the only sober one in the room,  I had a blast seeing how happy all of my tipsy neighbors were!!  But I am hearing an increasing trend of parents drinking and getting drunk at kids’ events.  WHY???  Cannot you not control yourself?  Do you think it’s cool?  It’s not cool.  As a matter of fact, it’s down right embarrassing to your kids and to yourself.

I view life in phases.  I had an EXCELLENT “party” phase!  It started at Penn State and stretched into my 20’s.  It was a good run.  I acted like a fool and made bad choices plenty of times.  I was never arrested, and no one got hurt.  But folks, IT’S OVER!  I am speaking to those of you like me, in your 40’s, who have kids who are watching your every move.  It’s time to move on and act responsibly!  I’m not saying to not be at the pool and have a beer or 2 with your neighbors while the kids are swimming.  A drink to take the edge off is welcomed and appreciated.  But to lose all sense of reality because you are drunk in front of your kids is absurd!  I’m sorry – tell me again why we have to have a drunk fest at kids’ sports events?  It’s not about us – it’s about our kids!!!  We are the parents, remember?  If you want to get bombed, lock yourself in your basement when the kids go to bed and go to town.  But if you are with your kids, be an adult and get a hold of yourself.

One of the worst stories I heard was that a dad was at an Indian Princess event with his daughter.  He is a prominent physician.  He got so drunk at the overnight camp, that he urinated all over himself and passed out in his urine in the hallway.  Yes, I even saw a picture of said event.  Are you kidding me?  That poor daughter.  And the guy is a doctor?  I wouldn’t be referring patients to that guy any time soon…

As you know, I try to challenge all of us (including Big Stace here) to push ourselves to be better human beings in general.  So, if you are reading this, and you’re like, “uh oh, this is me…”, then it might be time to do a little bit of self-evaluation and take it down a notch, because if I am hearing about this (and I pretty much live in a cave these days…) then it is becoming an issue worth examining.  If you are witness to such behavior, please do the right thing for the kids and give your friend a gentle tap on the shoulder, so as to say, “you may want to stop drinking now for the sake of many.”  It’s really not about us any more – it’s about being an example to the younger generation that is embodied by integrity and self-respect.

Enjoy a peaceful weekend,

Stacy

Thoughts on Red & Processed Meat from a Cancer Survivor

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A lot of people have been asking my thoughts on the new World Health Organization (WHO) guidelines linking red and processed meat to an increased risk of cancer, specifically colorectal cancer (by the way, that’s what I have!).  If you google this topic, it seems that everyone has their own take.  Of course the dairy farmers are all up in arms that it will hurt their business.  You have the medical community taking the hard line, then you have the NY Times that’s like, “Eh, what’s a little red meat?!  The risk is small.”  (by the way, isn’t being at risk like pregnancy? Either you are or you aren’t).

Thoughts on Red & Processed Meat from a Cancer Survivor

So, my thoughts are these:  there are A LOT of things that we all know aren’t good for us; cigarette smoking, overeating, eating too much sugar, drinking excess alcohol, eating a diet high in fat and sodium, not exercising, etc – but yet, for some odd reason, we do them anyhow.  I don’t think it takes a rocket scientist to figure out that certain habits and behaviors simply “aren’t good for us.”  A diet consisting of too much red meat and processed meat is really no different.  Anything that is bad for us to begin with really shouldn’t be done at all.  But if you insist on doing it, do it in moderation.  I mean, I could sit here and preach to you, but will anyone really listen to me?  I personally hate bacon (I’m told I am in the minority).  AND I have colorectal cancer.  SO, it would stand to reason that I give these things up completely.  And YES, that’s what I’ve done.  I would say that if you are a person who is “at risk”, either through a history of GI cancer especially in your family and/or GI ailments, you should probably do the same.  The rest of you are on your own to make an informed decision.

Today’s takeaway is: don’t you owe it to yourself to give your health the best chance possible to succeed?  You have ONE life (here that we know of…) and ONE body – do it some justice.  If you are smoking, stop.  If you aren’t exercising, start.  If you are overeating, stop.  Your body and your loved ones will thank you.  You have nothing to lose and everything to gain by doing these things.  And stop making excuses!  Get your shit together and DO IT!  Focus your mind and abilities towards these goals and START RIGHT NOW!  I’m not saying buy a professional juicer or purchase one of those high profile exercise programs.  Just do better than you did yesterday in one of these 3 areas.  You’ll be very proud of yourself.  And I’ll be proud of you too.

Peace in your world tonight,

Stacy

The Right Way to Express Empathy

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When I was in college, I was in an abusive relationship (more on that later…).  My parents sent me for counseling, which of course I fought, but did for them.  After a few useless sessions, I asked the psychologist, “Have you ever been in an abusive relationship?” She said, “No.”  Then I asked, “Then what do you know about how I feel if you’ve never gone through it?” She looked at me blankly.  I think she was trying to bridge to all of the “research” she’d done, but I walked out.  I was 22 years old, and I think she was 40 something.  No disrespect to research or anything, but until you’ve gone through something awful, devastating, and truly life changing (like it changes your life… every single day), you really don’t understand how someone feels about a certain situation.  And now that I’m the one who is 40 something, I would not fight counseling for anything.  If you get the right therapist, it can make a world of difference.  I just didn’t have the right one.

Last night, I was speaking with a mom friend whose husband suffered a stroke resulting in a traumatic brain injury about a year ago.  Ironically, his event happened the same time as my diagnosis within a few days.  As a matter of fact, we both coached our kids’ volleyball teams and were talking about how much we were looking forward to the school year ahead, and how it was going to be filled with promise and opportunity.  Both of our lives were shattered – our school year ahead was awful, tragic, and devastating; no promise; no opportunity – a lot of sadness and readjustment to our new lives.  Through all I’ve gone through with Emmett and his unmyelinated brain, I could completely relate to all she was talking about.  Her husband is non-verbal and he uses assistive technology to communicate – as does Emmett.  She relayed to me how cumbersome it is, and how frustrating it can be to figure out wants and needs, among many other things.  She was emotional, and I could tell that she doesn’t have a lot of people who have walked in her shoes.  I listened intently and offered comfort and ideas where I thought appropriate.  But I mostly listened with a sincere heart for all she is going through.The Right Way to Express Empathy

There is a fine line between “empathy” and “grandstanding.”  My friend clearly wanted to vent and talk about her experience.  It wasn’t my time to talk about my story with Emmett.  In other words, when someone is pouring out their heart to you about their challenges, don’t start talking about yourself, even though you’ve been through the same thing.  Just nod and listen- if they know your situation, they KNOW all you’ve been through.  They don’t want to hear about it NOW.  Just shut up and listen with a kind ear!  You’ll get your chance at a different time!!  When I was telling someone about how awful I felt after my surgery, they were like, “Oh yes, I had surgery, and I had this and that, and this is what I did, blah blah blah” SHUT THE HELL UP!!  Can I just tell you how awful I feel?  Can you just say, “That totally sucks, and I am so sorry.  How can I help you?”  Is that so tough?  Sheesh!!

 

I was fortunate enough to have a booth at the UPMC Integrative Oncology Wellness Fair last Thursday.  It was the best thing ever!  I was “The Patient is IN.  Meet Stacy.”  My story was displayed for others to read, and then they just wanted to tell their story to someone who could empathize – someone who walks in their shoes – someone who “gets it.”  If they talked, I listened.  If they asked a question, I answered the best and most honestly I could.  If they wanted a positive smile and word, I gave it to them.  But I mostly listened.

As a take off of a quote from my mother-in-law, “Use your ears a little more, and your mouth a little less.”  Yes, I can talk with the best of them… but I like listening 10 times more (little known fact…).  So, today, mostly listen.

Peace in your world today,

Stacy

The Importance of Being a Great Friend

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A gift Tina gave me – it is the Stand Up 2 Cancer Alex and Ani bracelet – you better believe I will, dear friend!!

I lost a dear friend (Tina) last night to Stage IV colon cancer.  She was 60.  Even though we only knew each other for a year (we met at chemo), we crammed a lifetime into that short period.  We lived 10 minutes apart and spoke pretty much every day about our good days and bad.  We shared laughs over pooping our pants (a fact of life after colon resection surgery) and tears over setbacks.  I will miss her spirit so much, and I will defeat this dreaded disease in her honor.  I have a close family member that also has the same diagnosis as me (I know, right?! what are the chances?).  Drew (my husband) told me the day after I got home from my surgery, and I am still in disbelief.  We also battle together and we are both moving forward.

So, I got thinking about true friendship, a theme that has really hit home during my illness.  I will never forget who was there for me at the beginning and who has remained steadfast in their support all the way through.  Some friends never really “show up” and some disappear after a token card or sentiment.  My battle will be going on a looooong time… so I treasure the ones who have stuck with me all this time and will stick with me forever.

I thought about the time that Tina asked me to drive her to her scan.  It was probably the last thing I wanted to do.  Number one, I felt like crap that day.  Number two, I sure as hell don’t want to go to the scan center if I don’t have to.  It conjures nothing but stress and anxiety for me.  Number three, I have about a million things going on at all times, whether it’s my actual day job, or something for my disabled son, or something for my typical son, or laundry (we have a lot of laundry in this house…), etc. And number four, they tell me that I have Stage IV cancer myself and need to “rest.” (sure, “rest”…). But then I thought, my friend needs me and I need to suck it up and do this for her.  Her results were good from that scan and we had a lovely lunch afterwards.  I will always remember that day and how important it was now that she has moved on to heaven.  There was another time that a good friend of mine (Erin) wanted to drive me to Starbucks soon after my surgery as a treat.  I was in a ton of pain and had a huge binder around my middle to hold me together to heal.  I could barely walk.  I asked her if she could take me to see Tina.  It was also an important day because it was the first time I got to meet one of the most important people in her life, her boyfriend Jeff.  Needless to say, Jeff and I ended up talking A LOT, especially these past few weeks.  I’ll always remember that day, too, because she was so happy and glowing, and proud to introduce me to him.  It was a special day.

So my point here is instead of making an “EXcuse” about all the reasons that you can’t be a friend; make an “INcuse” to show up and DO IT.  It may be inconvenient; you may be uncomfortable; it may be expensive; there may be prohibitive forces…but BE THE GREAT FRIEND!  Overcome those forces against you to show your friend that you are with her (him) in good times and in really, really bad ones as well!  Trust me, it will mean the world to them, and you are guaranteed to have a moment that you will never forget.

Peace in your world today,

Stacy

Off and blogging!

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Hi everyone!  Well, I’ve never “blogged” before, nor do I read blogs, so this should be interesting.  I hear that I’m supposed to “write from the heart,” so let’s go for it!  First, let me say how thrilled I was with yesterday’s premiere of my UPMC “Medical Monday” spot.  The wonders of makeup and editing!  But seriously, I was humbled and honored that Dr. Francis and the good folks at UPMC asked me to be their Integrative Oncology ambassador.  I have seen excellent results with the Integrative techniques that I’ve utilized to augment my treatment plan, so this girl is a believer! Here it is:

Second, I always set “ground rules” for anything formal I present, so I guess I can do that now:

  1. I am pretty opinionated, but my opinions are my own; not my husband’s, parents, kids’, friends’ or anyone else’s – just want to make sure that if I drag myself down, it’s just me – not any of my loved ones. If you are closed minded, don’t read my blog.
  2. I will talk about life, cancer, special needs, etc – I will use “colorful” language at times. If that offends you, don’t read my blog.
  3. I am a God person, so I will talk about my faith and God.  If that offends you, please substitute “energy,” “the universe,” or “the forces of life” or don’t read my blog.  I have many “non God” friends who don’t pray, and I love them.  I am like a well-known couples’ resort here – “all inclusive.” BYOB (Bring Your Own Beliefs).

Is anyone left who will read my blog?

For that one person out there (who I pay…), here are more ground rules:

  1. I hate to read – I don’t read books.  The last book I read was “To Kill A Mockingbird” in ninth grade, and that was because I had to.  So just for my own “attention and time challenged” self, I will try to keep each blog short and sweet (maybe not so sweet…see #2 above).
  2. I will try and give you something you can use each time.  I HATE sitting through lectures and conference calls and walking away saying, “I learned NOTHING!” I am practical to a fault, so let’s make this somewhat useful.
  3. I use “quotes” a lot – I am 45 years old, so I am a B.H. (before #hashtags) dinosaur.  Embrace the “quotes!”  LOL!

OK, that’s enough for now.  I’ll come up with some nifty acronyms, but for now, here’s my “useful tip of the day:”  (See #1…) I’ll only pass stuff along that I’ve done or am doing myself:

BEFORE your coffee (and believe me, I love coffee.  Coffee is life), begin each day with a cup of hot water with 3 drops of essential lemon oil (nutritional grade, which means it can be ingested).  I used to do lemon juice, until I read that it wears away the enamel on your teeth.  I can’t afford to lose any enamel, since chemotherapy is doing a good job on that… there are a ton of health benefits which you can google on your own, but simply put, it is an excellent anti-inflammatory cleansing drink for your GI tract.  Hot, because it will match your internal body temperature for easy absorption.

Peace in your world tonight,

Stacy