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A Magical March for Colon Cancer Awareness Month!

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Since I can’t steal “March Madness,” I thought I’d go with this!  Plus, there certainly was a lot of magic, and unlike my whole diagnosis and treatment, this is an experience that I WANT to relive… over and over!  So, I excitedly wanted to tell you about my amazing March (and we may just spill into April by a few days…).

First, was the official news that I was NED (no evidence of disease) on March 1st, the first day of Colon Cancer Awareness Month.  I’ve received so many signs along my journey, and this was certainly one of them.  We met with the same lung surgeon and the radiation oncologist who declared that my radiation treatments last October produced “satisfactory results” (surgeon speak) and now, it was determined I did not require additional radiation at this time.  That report, coupled with my first clear scan at the end of January declared me NED.  Since Stage IV colon cancer has one of the highest recurrence rates, the doctors don’t talk about “remission” or “cure” for at least 5 years, which means I keep going for chemo every 3 weeks indefinitely.  They call it “maintenance chemo” to keep the cancer away (that’s the goal).  Maybe it’s a lower dose, but I still feel sick, fatigued, and generally cruddy.  And I’m still on my 48 hour poison pump, which is a pain.  Many survivors have been NED and then suffer a recurrence somewhere, so I have to stay hypervigilant and on top of this shit.  Next scan is at the end of May.  Feel free to start the focused prayers/positive vibes now…

March 2nd was my bigger than life (literally) appearance on the Nasdaq screen in Times Square to “Join Genentech in the fight against colon cancer.”  Thank God it only rolled occasionally and for one day.  No one should be subjected to “Big Stace” quite that big.  But what a trip!  Every time I watch Shark Tank and see Kevin O’Leary standing in front of that screen at the opening credits, I always shout, “that was me!!”  Just getting the word out… in a BIG way!

Times Square - Genetech

March 4th was my next great day – National “Dress in Blue” Day for a future free of Colon Cancer.  A couple of friends of mine (Lynne Yater and Alissa McLellan) organized a fundraiser for the Colon Cancer Alliance in my honor, which was hosted St. Clair Fitness Center.  The girls ran a few pretty intense exercise and body pump classes – all I could do was witness in sheer awe… I took part in the brunch!  LOL!  I got to tell my story to a gym full of people who appreciate taking charge of one’s health through sweat and hard work!  I admire these folks!  One highlight was meeting Arthur Moats (Pittsburgh Steeler), who was there to work out.  And he listened to my story!  What an honor!  Now I have heard of Arthur Moats but when I was introduced, I just wasn’t putting it together (FAIL!), so I looked like somewhat of an idiot.  Meanwhile, Arthur is one the most sincere, down to earth, gracious individuals that I have ever met.  So respectful – so humble.  Wow!  It was really a pleasure to make his acquaintance.  THANK YOU Lynne & Alissa for a GREAT morning filled with positivity and lots of oxygen flowing in that room!

I hopped the T (I know… hard to believe that a big celebrity like me didn’t have a car service… scoff, scoff) downtown the same day to speak at the UPMC Integrative Oncology Breathing Room event at the Fairmont Hotel for my buddy, visionary oncologist, Dr. Lanie Francis.  Again, I told my story (backed up by my UPMC Medical Mondays video) to a room full of supportive folks who believe in the power of touch, movement, nutrition, and mindfulness to augment effectiveness and offset side effects of traditional chemotherapy.  This is my 2nd year participating in this event that raises money to provide services such as yoga, reiki, massage, and acupuncture to patients who cannot afford them.  Until we can get the insurances to wake up and reimburse for these treatments, UPMC continues to rely on outside support and is constructing a Wellness Suite at Hillman Cancer Center to accommodate a space for providers and patients.  It is a “labor of love”, and I am proud to be a part of it.

[Breathing Room Images Credit: Kylie Kristine Photo]

Next up – March 16th: partnering with Genentech for a Satellite Media Tour.  So what is a Satellite Media Tour, you ask?  Good question!  My treating oncologist, Dr. Vincent Reyes, and I sat in a studio in downtown Pittsburgh (after a heavy makeup application – for me, not Dr. Reyes) while different radio and television stations called in back to back for us to speak live or taped about the importance of screening for colon cancer.  I told my story and Dr. Reyes was the resident expert to speak about incidence and treatment options. It was a loooong day being that “on”, but we had so much fun!  Dr. Reyes and I both love the camera, so we took it super seriously, but were just able to be ourselves, which made it super comfortable.  We joked that we need a road show, because our relationship really showed through, which was what I wanted; as well as to impress my motto:  “if it can happen to me, a total healthy rule follower, then it can happen to anyone!  DON’T IGNORE SYMPTOMS!”

[What You Need to Know About Colon Cancer from NewsWatch Television on Vimeo.]

Other than that, I wrote an article for Everyday Health, was interviewed for another article in Dr. Oz’s magazine, managed to fit in 2 chemo weeks and celebrated a blessed, happy Easter!  (He is Risen!  Alleluia!).  Well, I am exhausted just writing this, and I’m in a treatment week yet again, so I am heading off to rest.  Thank you for reading this and for supporting my mission and passionate purpose.  I really mean it when I say, I love you!

Peace out,

Stacy

The Right Way to Express Empathy

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When I was in college, I was in an abusive relationship (more on that later…).  My parents sent me for counseling, which of course I fought, but did for them.  After a few useless sessions, I asked the psychologist, “Have you ever been in an abusive relationship?” She said, “No.”  Then I asked, “Then what do you know about how I feel if you’ve never gone through it?” She looked at me blankly.  I think she was trying to bridge to all of the “research” she’d done, but I walked out.  I was 22 years old, and I think she was 40 something.  No disrespect to research or anything, but until you’ve gone through something awful, devastating, and truly life changing (like it changes your life… every single day), you really don’t understand how someone feels about a certain situation.  And now that I’m the one who is 40 something, I would not fight counseling for anything.  If you get the right therapist, it can make a world of difference.  I just didn’t have the right one.

Last night, I was speaking with a mom friend whose husband suffered a stroke resulting in a traumatic brain injury about a year ago.  Ironically, his event happened the same time as my diagnosis within a few days.  As a matter of fact, we both coached our kids’ volleyball teams and were talking about how much we were looking forward to the school year ahead, and how it was going to be filled with promise and opportunity.  Both of our lives were shattered – our school year ahead was awful, tragic, and devastating; no promise; no opportunity – a lot of sadness and readjustment to our new lives.  Through all I’ve gone through with Emmett and his unmyelinated brain, I could completely relate to all she was talking about.  Her husband is non-verbal and he uses assistive technology to communicate – as does Emmett.  She relayed to me how cumbersome it is, and how frustrating it can be to figure out wants and needs, among many other things.  She was emotional, and I could tell that she doesn’t have a lot of people who have walked in her shoes.  I listened intently and offered comfort and ideas where I thought appropriate.  But I mostly listened with a sincere heart for all she is going through.The Right Way to Express Empathy

There is a fine line between “empathy” and “grandstanding.”  My friend clearly wanted to vent and talk about her experience.  It wasn’t my time to talk about my story with Emmett.  In other words, when someone is pouring out their heart to you about their challenges, don’t start talking about yourself, even though you’ve been through the same thing.  Just nod and listen- if they know your situation, they KNOW all you’ve been through.  They don’t want to hear about it NOW.  Just shut up and listen with a kind ear!  You’ll get your chance at a different time!!  When I was telling someone about how awful I felt after my surgery, they were like, “Oh yes, I had surgery, and I had this and that, and this is what I did, blah blah blah” SHUT THE HELL UP!!  Can I just tell you how awful I feel?  Can you just say, “That totally sucks, and I am so sorry.  How can I help you?”  Is that so tough?  Sheesh!!

 

I was fortunate enough to have a booth at the UPMC Integrative Oncology Wellness Fair last Thursday.  It was the best thing ever!  I was “The Patient is IN.  Meet Stacy.”  My story was displayed for others to read, and then they just wanted to tell their story to someone who could empathize – someone who walks in their shoes – someone who “gets it.”  If they talked, I listened.  If they asked a question, I answered the best and most honestly I could.  If they wanted a positive smile and word, I gave it to them.  But I mostly listened.

As a take off of a quote from my mother-in-law, “Use your ears a little more, and your mouth a little less.”  Yes, I can talk with the best of them… but I like listening 10 times more (little known fact…).  So, today, mostly listen.

Peace in your world today,

Stacy

Off and blogging!

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Hi everyone!  Well, I’ve never “blogged” before, nor do I read blogs, so this should be interesting.  I hear that I’m supposed to “write from the heart,” so let’s go for it!  First, let me say how thrilled I was with yesterday’s premiere of my UPMC “Medical Monday” spot.  The wonders of makeup and editing!  But seriously, I was humbled and honored that Dr. Francis and the good folks at UPMC asked me to be their Integrative Oncology ambassador.  I have seen excellent results with the Integrative techniques that I’ve utilized to augment my treatment plan, so this girl is a believer! Here it is:

Second, I always set “ground rules” for anything formal I present, so I guess I can do that now:

  1. I am pretty opinionated, but my opinions are my own; not my husband’s, parents, kids’, friends’ or anyone else’s – just want to make sure that if I drag myself down, it’s just me – not any of my loved ones. If you are closed minded, don’t read my blog.
  2. I will talk about life, cancer, special needs, etc – I will use “colorful” language at times. If that offends you, don’t read my blog.
  3. I am a God person, so I will talk about my faith and God.  If that offends you, please substitute “energy,” “the universe,” or “the forces of life” or don’t read my blog.  I have many “non God” friends who don’t pray, and I love them.  I am like a well-known couples’ resort here – “all inclusive.” BYOB (Bring Your Own Beliefs).

Is anyone left who will read my blog?

For that one person out there (who I pay…), here are more ground rules:

  1. I hate to read – I don’t read books.  The last book I read was “To Kill A Mockingbird” in ninth grade, and that was because I had to.  So just for my own “attention and time challenged” self, I will try to keep each blog short and sweet (maybe not so sweet…see #2 above).
  2. I will try and give you something you can use each time.  I HATE sitting through lectures and conference calls and walking away saying, “I learned NOTHING!” I am practical to a fault, so let’s make this somewhat useful.
  3. I use “quotes” a lot – I am 45 years old, so I am a B.H. (before #hashtags) dinosaur.  Embrace the “quotes!”  LOL!

OK, that’s enough for now.  I’ll come up with some nifty acronyms, but for now, here’s my “useful tip of the day:”  (See #1…) I’ll only pass stuff along that I’ve done or am doing myself:

BEFORE your coffee (and believe me, I love coffee.  Coffee is life), begin each day with a cup of hot water with 3 drops of essential lemon oil (nutritional grade, which means it can be ingested).  I used to do lemon juice, until I read that it wears away the enamel on your teeth.  I can’t afford to lose any enamel, since chemotherapy is doing a good job on that… there are a ton of health benefits which you can google on your own, but simply put, it is an excellent anti-inflammatory cleansing drink for your GI tract.  Hot, because it will match your internal body temperature for easy absorption.

Peace in your world tonight,

Stacy